Petreece Cuffie

Petreece Cuffie

Founding Partner - Counselling and Interpersonal Services

Moving forward…. Let us stop reacting out of our pain

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About 10 years ago our home was broken into and the thieves really took everything that they could carry in what I believe to be a truck! They also made a mess of the place…. It was traumatic.
Our DVD collection was gone! Now we did not buy pirated DVDs or CDs only originals…. (If you paid money to produce something and this is your work/ministry you would hope everyone would buy originals).
My response was… “I’m trying to do the right thing and this is what happened to me…I’m going to buy $10 DVDs (pirated) from now on!”
My husband said nothing for a while and then one day he confronted me. I told him how I felt and he left me alone…I believe he was praying for me. He eventually spoke to me again and we talked about the example to our daughter…we need to teach and model what was right. Now believe me, every time I bought a pirated DVD I felt badly but I “argued” with the feeling and looked at all the other “happy” people that did not seem to be bothered by this practice. One day I think God said enough is enough! I had my daughter with me and we were discussing what movies she wanted to see…and it hit me…I am really teaching my daughter to sin/do the wrong thing because of my hurt… this has gone too far! I spoke to her, spoke to God and my husband.
So I was hurt…who isn’t? Life is unfair for everyone! It is still not a reason for me to do the things I know to be wrong…things, which hurt others and us.
What are you doing which is really a response to hurt?
I still have this battle from time to time… For example, people who I didn’t expect hurt me deeply and I just want to pull away from everyone except my family, but with God’s grace and support from others like my husband I choose to heal, learn and move pass the pain.
Self-awareness (being real with what I’m really feeling and thinking), dependence on God’s grace/strength, allowing support from others and a willingness to learn from the experience is necessary to move forward and stop reacting out of pain.
It’s time to let it go…isn’t it?!
Blessings

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